My Weight Story

I am really looking forward to a healthy body, better energy levels and a slimmer figure.

Just looking nicer in clothes can give you such a confidence boost. I have been unhappy with the way I look most of my life. It's a hard pill to swallow, but it's the truth.

There were times that I have got my weight down for a short period, in between two pregnancies (the second a twin pregnancy), but it has always been an ongoing battle with only short-lived victories.

If I think about all the sizes I have been in the last 15 years alone and all the clothes I have bought and loved and then given away because I have gained weight and had to buy larger sizes - well I think of the waste - of money, of time that I could have enjoyed feeling good about myself and of my wellbeing and the toll that it has taken on my body.

I won't tell you the full story of my battle with my weight right now, let's just say that I have always had a battle with the scales. I'll start with the past 15 years. When I got married in 2000, I was a size 14 - 76 kgs, which I had maintained for a couple years prior.  For my height, this was a healthy weight and although I secretly would have liked to drop to a size 12, I would have been happy to stay a size 14 with a few curves and a a wide variety of stores stocking my size.

Then at some point over the next 4-5 years my weight crept up and I started venturing into size 16 territory. Occasionally I would get back down to a size 14, but I would always end up back at a 16.

After the birth of my first child, I had actually lost weight during pregnancy but quickly regained weight and in the first year I crept up from a size 14 to a 16 then to an 18 and then in 2008 / 2009 around the time my daughter turned two I reached a size 20-22. 

I am guessing (because I was too scared to weigh myself at that time) that I would have tipped the scales at around 110 kgs. That is 35 kgs heavier than 8 years previous.

At this point I realised that my wellbeing was suffering and I felt both physically and emotionally uncomfortable in my own skin, but it was when we decided to expand our family and I was required to lose weight to be elligible for fertility treatment that I was able to find the will to reduce my weight to 99 kgs. 

It took only a few months to fall pregnant following a successful fertility procedure and with twins on board I gained weight, but fortunately it was all baby related. 

Once the twins were born (8 and 6 pounds respectively) and I was breast feeding, the remaining weight dropped off and I was down to a size 16 within weeks following the birth.

I was thrilled to be so much lighter and was determined to keep my weight under control, but it was not to be.

Difficulties with breastfeeding and the demands of two new babies in the house lead to a switch to bottle feeding after about 3-4 months. I had been struggling to eat enough while breast feeding, but suddenly I wasn't feeding any longer and my hunger didn't seem to dissipate. I was comfort eating as well and I didn't seem to care anymore about how big I was getting or how hard it was going to be to get back the weight loss that pregnancy and childbirth had offered up to me a second time.

I packed on the weight and crept up to a size 18 and then on to 20 - again.  I sat there for a while, not appreciating the view at all. It is so hard to look nice in a size 20, buying clothes from the 'plus size' stores and feeling like everything in the world has suddenly shrunk around you. Spilling over the edge of chairs, needing an extender on your plane seat belt, not even recognising yourself in the reflection of shop windows and then being horrified once you realise it is you.

It is a scary place to be, a place where I swore I would never go back, back at size 20. I looked pregnant and I'm certain  people thought I was.

I was scared enough to ask for help - in 2013 I went and saw a Doctor, not just about my weight but my health in general. The Doctor's advice - to treat myself with food, the right food, fresh, organic, unrefined foods. Food that our bodies are designed to process - not refined and heavily processed grains, starches, sugar and dairy products that have over-fueled our bodies.  She told me to research the information, use my brain and make decisions about my nutrition based on recent scientific findings and logic - not advertising, brands, past ideas of balanced nutrition, or traditions which are based on excess and overindulgence.

This concept made sense to me. Our lives in the 21st century are much different to our ancestors one hundred years ago let alone 40,000 years ago, but our bodies are still very much the same.  We need to look at our lifestyles, our environment and unique physiological makeup to make an assessment of our individual nutritional needs.

I found an article online which had a new food pyramid to use as a guideline for healthy eating which aligns with my philosophy. 

Here is the link to the website so you can read about it: 

http://www.fitnessfirst.com.au/healthy-eating/the-new-food-pyramid/

Our bodies are very efficient and one thing I believe is that we can ALL probably not only survive but thrive on less. Over-eating is as much an issue as under-nourishment. If we can use the right fuel for our bodies in the right proportion we can maintain a healthy body and save our body systems from being overworked and becoming weak and ill.

After seeing the Doctor, I decided to go gluten, dairy and sugar free. I reduced my portions but kept the nutritional value of my meals high. I persisted for 4 months and it paid off. I started at a weight of 106 kgs and lost 13 kgs and 2 dress sizes. 93 kgs and a size 16 - it felt amazing.

But it all started to go wrong. I was going through a number of changes, moving house, issues with my new job and life with the demands of a young family.  At some point the gluten, dairy and sugar rich foods crept back in, the portion sizes grew bigger and I lost sight of my goals. My automatic response to the chaos in my life was to turn to food to fill the void and numb the pain with comfort eating. I began gaining weight again.  Over the next 18 months I crept up to 105kgs and my size 18 clothes began to get tight on me once more.  I took this as a sign that I needed to get back on track with my nutrition!

So now I try to look at each day as an opportunity to benefit nutritionally. I think carefully about each and everything I consume and what it offers me. I think about this in terms of taste too, because this has a big impact on my enjoyment of food and enjoying the foods that are of benefit to me.

If something has very little benefit to me, or worse will have a detrimental effect on my health, it is not hard to say 'no' to it. It just requires a bit of thought and logic when making choices about nutrition.

That is my weight story to date. I am currently at 97.1 kgs and enjoying the benefits of eating well - including the resulting weight loss.  I am still on my journey of discovery about how to heal my body with food, but I am happy to keep learning on the path to wellbeing.